Captains Log:
April 27, Year 2020, Day 4 of Covid-19 Quarantine
24:00 Captains Log: I have downloaded a game on my portable communicating device to occupy some time while the large male hogs the middle of my bed and dreams he is a motorcycle. Roll.over.rover!
01:00 Captains Log: Honestly, this dog is snoring like a Harley Davidson road trip! He.must.run.on.batteries!
02:00 Captains Log: By the center of a jelly donut! Stop snoring! Could it be? YES! I have never been so happy, I have to use the lavatory! Thank you infant like bladder! The large male is awake and follows me. Hurry.up.I.may.not.make.it!
02:01 Captains Log: HOLY SH*T the little one named Jameson is barking at me! Oye.vey.it’s.me!
03:00 Captains Log: Must get to sleep before the snoring-starts-again…and…too late. How’d.he.do.that?
06:45 Captains Log: Message from Vessel Courtyard Engineer – Message reads: “who is coming in at 7?” Response from Vessel Courtyard Acting Captain: “Why do you ask? It’s the same person every week and you still have 15 minutes!” end message. I.believe.tensions.may.be.high.
07:00 Captains Log: I would normally be at the Vessel Courtyard by this time, ready to forge ahead with our remaining crew members to ensure we are functioning at maximum effort with the resources we have. This pandemic has sunk this Captains morale like a photon torpedo to the hull. I miss my crew and working hard with them. However I always live by a motto, Health and Family first. I would hate to jeopardize my Courtyard families health and now need to take care of my Home Vessel family. A.somber.entry.reality.bites.
08:00 Captains Log: Sick bay patient is awake, her coffee is brewing. Day 4, I receive no threats from the patient. Thanks.Mr.Coffee.
10:00 Captains Log: My mother informs me she is dropping off eggs and milk to the Home Vessel. As her vehicle pulls into view, I am outside bringing a sanitation receptacle to the docking station. Mother sees this, scowls and with a swift swooshing wave of her hand I am retreating back inside. Memories flood back from my youth of that very signal which signifies “Get your ass in that house!” Momma.ain’t.playing!
12:00 Captains Log: Today I am feeling the effects of this virus. My palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy
There’s vomit on my sweater already, mom’s spaghetti
I’m nervous, but on the surface I look calm and ready to drop bombs, but I keep on forgettin‘. WebMD Covid-19 symptoms or Eminem? You.be.the.judge.
12:01 Captains Log: My own skin is irritating me! Achy.sneezy.coughing.
13:00 Captains Log: The day has a bright spot. I was able to procure a provision delivery slot from the local merchant. Lucky.Charms.are.on.their.way!
14:00 Captains Log: The pack is confused. I assume they are accustomed to free run of the environment. Having 24 hour human interaction seems to have them confused but content with the companionship. I venture below deck to retrieve water only to be encountered by another furry like creature of feline descent. While the pack on main deck show excitement with the interaction, this species is looking at me with contempt. My confidence has been rapidly depleted by this creature. I have second guessed all my hypothesis regarding the pack and who leads it. This feline is definitely in charge! Why.does.she.stare.at.me.that.way?
14:05 Captains Log: I engage the feline creature. Offer food water and affection. All accepted, for about 8 seconds at which point she hisses and retreats back to her quarters. I assume she has mistaken me for a predator. I whisper to her “I mean you no harm…” she stares me down forcing me to break eye contact and retreat above deck. Must.be.a.cat!
15:00 Captains Log: I have decided this virus sucks red baboon ass. My taste is slowly fading and my sense of smell has dissipated. While this will be useful in the event the pack is once again flatulent, I feel the loss of taste and smell will ruin the anticipated arrival of the Lucky Charms. They’re.magically.delicious.
17:00 Captains Log: Mess Hall Chicken soup from Panera. Penicillin.for.the.soul.
19:00 Captains Log: This virus is a rollercoaster, I now have a low grade 100.2 fever. I have requested extra meds. Delivery is swift by my brother Sean and sister-in-law Trish it’s nice having people who care for you’re well being. The.Devil.Dog.and.cupcake.were.a.bonus!
19:30 Captains Log: The sickbay patient and crew have retired to their quarters. The Pack has made themselves comfortable spread out on my mattress leaving my legs a small path to stretch. No.bed.yoga.tonight.
20:00 Captains Log: I think this will be my last entry for the evening. I must rest. There are rumors there will finally be a big yellow ball of fire sighting tomorrow. People are calling it “The Sun.” After days cooped up I look forward to sitting deck side and getting some Natural Vitamin D. Yes.I.just.ate.the.cupcake!
20:01 Captains Log: Correction: Loss of smell due to Coronavirus is no match for dog farts! Someone.light.a.match!
#Adulting 